


You Were Beautiful

by ruoyeah



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Break Up, Crying, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, How Do I Tag, I'm Bad At Tagging, M/M, Post-Break Up, Tags Are Hard
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-06
Updated: 2021-02-06
Packaged: 2021-03-18 13:54:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29244642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ruoyeah/pseuds/ruoyeah
Summary: Iwaizumi Hajime reminisces the past where he can still hold his greatest 'what if' back when he's still in high school, Oikawa Tooru.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime & Oikawa Tooru, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Comments: 2
Kudos: 7





	You Were Beautiful

**Author's Note:**

> hello there, random reader. ( ° ∀ ° )ﾉﾞ i seriously feel that this one won't be seen by anyone, but still, just in case someone actually reads this, hey. how are you? pls drink ur H²O before reading this because you need to stay hydrated, and so do i. i am proud of you, and i am silently rooting for you, bb.
> 
> n yessir, the title is based on the k-band i stan's song, You Were Beautiful by DAY6! (pls do listen to them, their songs hits harder than a 10 wheeler truck)
> 
> anyways, please excuse my horrible writing and grammatical errors if there are any. you see, English isn't my native language. 
> 
> i hope you find this well, and enjoy this li'l IwaOi i wrote last year.

You would always ask how you look while looking through the camera of your phone and pouting your pinkish plump lips and I'd say you look like a shit or you're a fucking trash can—and God forgive me, I was lying the whole time.

The truth was—you looked a lot like forever. With your hazel orbs that seems to hug my entirety that looked like sunflowers on summer, your chocolate fluffy hair, and your damned lips that makes me want to commit and go beg on my knees—I could never ever dare dislike you. 

But of course, as the Iwaizumi 'coward' Hajime, I could never admit any of this. Not to Oikawa Tooru who'd tease me 'til I die. No.

The blazing sun was merciless then, when you smiled at me strikingly. I was in awe, of course, as always. I kind of felt courageous for the first time.

Then here I was, standing right becore you. It was summer back then when I my throat felt dry and lips felt heavy to move when I faced your dazzling face. I cleared my throat and tried to remember the script I memorize last night, but my mind went blank. I could only whisper profanities until my heart bleed—I can't hold my feelings anymore.

"O-Oikawa!" I called you by your surname. Your ethereal face turned to me, confusion dancing beneath your eyes.

I can still remember the smirk playing on your lips back then. "What is it, sweetheart?" you chuckled lightly. My stomach seemed to turn a little by the damn endearment. I gulped.

Your expression then shifted into a worried one when I didn't reply. "Uh, is something the matter, Iwa-chan?"

"Hey—"

"I FUCKING LIKE YOU, Y-YOU DUMBASS BLOCKHEAD STUPID SHITTY S-SETTER!"

It was a blur—but I guess you replied with a kiss. Just like on my dreams, your lips felt like dreamy clouds and sweet candy. 

If only my heart wasn't caged, maybe it already went away. But I'm quite sure my heart will go to heaven.

"Guess what, Hajime. We're on the same page."

Time passed like a blur—our high school days were almost over. We failed to go to Nationals, and I know you were sad. It was your dream, after all.

Under the night sky and falling stars, as the "The Search is Over" is playing on the stereo, you were leaning on my shoulder, eyes closed. Silence engulped us both, but no one dared to break it. The moment felt ethereal and unreal. I almost wished to stop time.

"Tooru..." 

"Hmm?"

You straightened your back and looked at me directly in the eye. I felt my heart jumped a millimeter or two when our eyes met. There I saw it—in your eyes, I can see forever.

"I fucking love you." I said underneath my breathe.

"I love you too."

We shared the kiss that night, and the millions of stars are the witness of our love. 

But still, I could only wish that we stayed right on that moment when we were still high school—young, dumb, and broke.

Almost everything changed when we step into college. Well, except us. We were strong and sturdy, but I can still feel our gap creeping against my heart and soul.

You were a man filled with colorful dreams, after all. And I was just a lost cause—a monotonous bastard trying to stay alive.

"Tooru..." I called you out. You tilted your head on the side, looking at me curiously.

"Hm, baby? Why?" you asked.

I sighed hwavily. "If ever you'll have to choose between me and your dreams, I'd rather you not choose me."

"Choose your dreams. Always. I can wait even if it takes an eternity, Tooru."

You didn't answer, but I could make out a ghost of a bitter smile on your face.

"I love you, Hajime."

And then, that time came. Tooru was invited to an international volleyball tryouts which tests one's ability and if you get lucky, you can be a part of a team abroad. I can still remember how happy you are when you delivered the news to me, and I just hope I could be the same.

I was overwhelmed. I realized you were just too much for me—I don't deserve you. You carried the cosmos on your back—the nebulas, the planets, moon, stars—the universe. And I was just a mere comet passingby. I was nothing compared to you and your dreams that was bound to come true.

I was just a bastard trying to stay alive and be enough, and you were the light that came to guide me. 

I just...I have nothing to prove. You deserve everything, love.

"Oikawa..." I called. My voice sounded hoarse, and I felt as if my throat got stucked.

"Yes, baby? Is there something wrong?" you asked. 

When I saw the smile on your bright face, I almost melt and cry on your shoulders. I can't believe I'll break your heart tonight, but this is for the best. I am sorry.

"Let's end this. Let's break up."

The smile on your lips fell. "W-what? You're joking, right?"

"No, I'm not." I wish I was.

You forced a laughter, almost pathetically. "Hajime, t-that's not funny. Fuck."

My heart broke. I felt my eyes moisten. But I must stay strong. I have to do this. I have to let go of your fragile hands, love.

"Oikawa..."

"Hajime. I did everything I could, right? I gave all of me. Is it not enough? Am I not enough?"

I can only look away. I gulped. I don't know what to do. If I looked at you again, I wouldn't be able to let you go.

Hands shaking, you held my hands. And then you kneel. Eyes with tears. You kissed my hands, begging. I shut my eyes close, tears flowing down.

"H-hajime, I love you. Don't leave me. Please. You're the only one that keeps me going. Iwaizumi, listen." you begged.

"Aren't we going to marry each other? W-we'll still fulfill our dreams, right? It was y-you who told me that we're gonna travel the world."

"Answer me, Hajime. When did I not give you my all?"

Stop. Please, Tooru. I might not be able to release your hand. 

You kept talking although your voice was cracking. "Is this because of my departure to Argentina soon? J-just tell me, Haj. I'll let go of that shit! You're more important, anyways." 

"No! T-tooru—"

"Damn it, Iwaizumi! JUST TELL ME WHERE I WASN'T ENOUGH! I'LL FIX IT. Just d-don't let go of m-me..."

Your sobs resounded the quiet street. It was unbearable to hear. I suddenly want to hug you and tell you that I was just kidding, and everything's alright.

Unfortunately, it wasn't.

I sighed and kneeled down. I held your hands tight and kissed you for the last time. The kiss was painful to hold on to. I felt your body weaken. My hands were shaking as well as my voice when I held your face and forced myself to smile.

"I-I'm sorry, Tooru. T-this is for the best. P-please, reach your dreams. I love you."

"Rule the court, love."

The sound of the whistle took me back to reality. It was this day, right? I've prepared for this for so long. I can't wait.

I felt the excitement rushed through my veins. Today was the day where Japan and Argentina will face each other in volleyball tournament which meant one thing—I'm gonna see ny high school sweetheart.

As the players of Argentina appears, my heart skipped a beat when our eyes met. The same eyes that looked like home. You smiled at me which I failed to return. I was enthralled by you, again and again after all these years.

I can only smile bitterly.

"WAKA-CHAN! BABE!" 

I watched you as you ran towards my team, to Ushijima Wakatoshi specifically. You dived to him which surprised him.

If only I chose to be with you all those times, would everything be different now?

I was dumb back then. And maybe until now. I shouldn't have let you go. I should have hugged you instead of hurting you by my words.

I should have accompanied you through your journey and not left you alone.

You are my and will always be my greatest what if, Tooru.

Now as I see you look at him with your eyes that looked a lot like forever, as your hand held him that once held me, as you embrace him with your frail body that once warms me in winters, I just reminisced about the times we were together. All those years that was buried into nothing.u

My lips curved into a smile. It may be too late, but I just wanted to say this after all those years I lied about how you look—

"You were beautiful."

**Author's Note:**

> another reminder to drink your H²O and straighten your banana shaped posture. Thank you for reading ❤


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